I have about 15 questions waiting in my inbox. And they are hard. I don't feel like answering them. One in particular comes to me from a guy named Scott (okay that's a lie, I have no idea which one asked me this):
Why are you $ingle?
Four little words have proven so daunting. Every time I think of crafting a response I am stumped. What is this guy looking for? A history of my relationships and why they failed? For me to reveal that I have outstanding restraining orders issued by boyfriends past? There is no way this is the venue for those kinds of discussions. And in true HJNTIY fashion, who the F cares (pardon my language $L#1's mom...)? I am single because I'm not dating anyone. Why do people obsess over reasons for everything? Sometimes things just are.
And furthermore, isn't this question kind of like when you lose your keys, and someone so matter-of-factly says, "Well where did you have them last?" If I KNEW where I was when I had my keys, they would not be lost. Is it true that if I knew why I was single, I wouldn't be?
Anyway it's late and I just finished watching an episode of LOST and I haven't a clue which way is up. Goodnight. And I'm not answering that question, Steve, or whoever you are.
$L#2
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