$ingle Lady #1 - You've Never Looked Better

What a great email subject line to wake up to. I may program my clock radio (ok, I don't really have one of those, but I secretly miss it) to wake me up with that statement every morning. I open it up, and squint to read the print on my teensy Blackberry screen - it begins with "You're about to get a makeover!" This just keeps getting better and better! What a well spent $120, because I know that's about what a haircut at SuperCuts costs in NYC, let alone a full blown makeover! Alas, it's just my profile, as eHarmz is renovating. On the bright side, photos will now be 2x larger - plan foiled you suitors who use those ridiculous far-off scenery shots from atop the Great Wall. See $L#2.

Dustin (28, New York, United States) has joined official email communication. Unlike Wesley, who pointlessly FastTracked me to two ignored emails, he fed off of information we've exchanged to craft a funny and relevant first email. It's almost like we've actually met! I'm now almost convinced either we're soul mates, or that he and Alan (ALSO 28, New York, United States) are manipulating the system, and are in this together! Stay with me here...

Dustin begins with was list 5 random things about yourself was one, where I obviously revealed that I'm pretty sure I still hold the record for fastest scans per minute at the grocery store I worked at when I was 16 (shout out Quality Markets...now in bankruptcy...all downhill after I left). Alan begins with list 10 random things about yourself (greedy bastard). They sneakily split for the second one - Dustin, with a direct playful hit to my sports fandom. "Of your teams 4 straight Super Bowl defeats, which was the hardest to swallow?" Knife to the heart, sir, but touche. Alan comes at me with a stupid question about describing a dream I look forward to coming true. Lame. Dustin ends with asking me if I'm adventurous. Eh. At Alan's third one I gag a little bit - "They say life is about simple pleasures. What's your simplest pleasure and how does it make you feel?" Gross. In my quest to be white-lie-only truthful to these gents, I replied that my simplest pleasure is hot dogs, and I feel full because of them.

Fast forward to today, when Dustin responds to my answers with his first open email. The line appears: "Most importantly, which place makes a better hot dog -PDT or shakeshack??" Now, all you non-New Yorkers don't know this, but PDT (the hot dog part of which is called Crif Dogs) is a hole-in-the-wall dive that makes hot dogs deep-fried and wrapped in bacon, smothered in amazing toppings. My personal fave is sour cream and avocado (a diet only a mother could love...). Shakeshack is a NYC landmark. At first, I exclaimed in delight - what a thoughtful email! He responded to the other points in my answers, and in a grand finale, throws out two of the greatest hot dog vendors of all time. I'll even overlook the doube question mark. But wait, look back, oh loyal reader, as it was ALAN, not Dustin, who got my response about hot dogs.

Re-creeped out. I retire for the night.

xo,
$ingle Lady #1